When Leah Houghtaling became a mother, time seemed to fast-forward. Taking the time to think and reflect without interruption became challenging and it’s something she says she misses when life is busy. But Leah’s mother, Nancy Daniels, has always been there to talk with her and point out when something ordinary, or extraordinary, becomes a gift. The two did just that when they visited the StoryCorps mobile booth in Buffalo this past October. In our latest installment of the StoryCorps Buffalo series, Leah and Nancy talk about how adoption has been a gift to both of them.
Leah and Nancy recorded their story at the StoryCorps Buffalo mobile tour stop on September 13, 2016.
Originally aired on February 22, 2017 on WBFO.
Read the transcript below:
Nancy Daniels (ND) and Leah Houghtaling (LH)
ND: We were just devastated when we found out we would not be having any children of our own and immediately started looking around for ways to get children of our own.
And then somebody at work who had adopted children from Korea told dad that Korea had children for adoption.
I remember you came Friday. You came on Good Friday that year. It was a good Friday. And the plane came and, of course, you were not the only child on the plane. Some of the little children were crying. You weren’t crying. And that was such a happy moment. It was exciting and scary, and I remember thinking, “Holy cow, my life is never going to be the same again.” And it never was. It was a really good way improved, believe me. We were in love before we saw you.
You were the most beautiful baby I ever saw in my life. It was…well you never forget things like that.
LH: Well because of that I always knew that I wanted to adopt my own baby from Korea. But I guess I couldn’t have expected just how incredible sharing that experience would be. I mean, the process, and the waiting, and the anxiety, and finally that pure joy in meeting our darling JeeBhin. Having that experience and knowing that that was so similar. Like, it was just so similar. I feel like until that happened, it was…like, we shared that mothering moment.
When Alex and I decided to try to expand our family and, ultimately granted Jee-Jee’s wish for a baby sister, how did you feel about my pregnancy while I was pregnant?
ND: I don’t know. It was a tricky thing. That was a tricky thing. I found myself worrying about your health. I found myself – since I had never gone through a delivery – I worried about that endlessly. It sounded horrible. I worried about the baby’s health. And believe it or not, the time seemed to whiz by.
We are so lucky. I don’t have any words for it. But you have been the joy of my life Leah. You saved us from…I always think of you as the child who saved us from not having children.
If I wasn’t your mom some other wonderful lucky person would be and you would still be you, because it was inside of you before I ever even got my hands on you. You were just naturally wonderful.
LH: Well, sometimes I wonder, you know when I was in Korea I left a note in my file just kind of thanking my birth mother for the choices that she made. Because I can’t imagine growing up in Korea. I mean my life was my life, and she’ll probably never get that. But I never longed to be there. I just have always thought it would be really neat to say thank you to her for making that choice.
ND: I love your mother. I love your mother for the sacrifice she made. I can remember soon after you came, I was taking a shower and I was crying, and I found myself actually praying for your mother and wishing there was just some way she could know exactly what you want her to know – that she produced this wonderful little baby at that time and that we were so grateful to god that we were able to be part of your life.
